Friday, 31 October 2014

The Game of Bullying

The beautiful month of October comes to an end. Whatever begins ends. I am without any beginning therefore I am infinite and immortal. Crickets are singing in chorus. Moderately cold pleasant and soothing breeze is blowing and crescent Moon is singing lullabies.

A student came to meet me the other day. He is a meek little fellow harassed by  bullying. Not only do his fellow classmates harass him but also his teachers do. The world seems to be an alien field full of booby traps to him. He is fed up by swear words of his classmates. He finds sexual talks of his classmates too indiscreet and it causes discomfiture for him. I understood his problem and advised him. I asked him to give up all defence and resistance and face the wind. I asked him to become part of his classmates' circle. I asked him to give up the idea that he is in any way purer and more innocent than the others around him. I suggested him to realize that things are the way they're because of his attitude towards them. I told him that he is harassed because of his complex of superiority and not because everyone around him is a badass. The attitude to consider his classmates bad guys is not going to solve his problems in the long run. The consideration to withdraw from the current school and take admission into a different one is not going to solve your problems because you would find same people everywhere, as they exist in your head, I said! It's so because bad guys exist in your head and not outside. If you continue with this attitude you would always see world as a hostile place. Just accept your classmates and friends the way they're and don't judge them...share lunch with them and spend time with them and soon you will see that there would be no bullying whatsoever. 

The problem is in bifurcating the personalities. The child is taught that using swear words is bad and you should not learn about sexual things. You should not know exactly how a child is born. The child is fed-up with nonsense fairy tales about these things. He assumes whatever his parents are teaching him is absolute Truth but then he notices that people around him including his father and uncle use swear words and he develops a bipolar disorder. There is a bad guy who uses the swear words and then there is a good guy who considers himself goodie two shoes and regards his mates as bad guys because they use swear words and they talk about sex. This divided child struggles his way to become a divided adult. The world remains that for him---a hostile bullying cabal. The soultion is--make a whole of his psyche--tell him what is what as soon as you could. Tell him to accept things as they are not to develop a judgmental attitude. He would develop a conflict free personality at ease with himself and others this way!