Sunday, 27 March 2011

Who gets fever on which day---a very short story!


DISCLAIMER:
I cannot confirm or deny that anything the following prose says,  has any connection to any matter true or false or any event that has, is, or will occur in the history of the universe. Any similarity to an event or  with an actual existing person(s) is purely coincidental."


A team in an IT company was working on a very critical project.  Manager wanted team members who were ready to take challenges. The first question which any candidate joining into the project had to answer was: “Are you comfortable staying in office after midnight?”. Horrible deadlines and unrealistic goals. Unclear requirements and myriads of code changes. Team members had to stretch every-day(night). They were working too hard. They were working sixteen hours a day. All of them had pathetic nightmares. They started to have those vicious cycles of incessant chattering to themselves. Their personal lives got spoiled. Manager, though a generous and gregarious human being, was in soup, therefore, he was not able to grant any leaves to any of the team members. Team members were not able to attend even the marriage ceremonies of their close relatives.

They continued in this fashion for about two months. Some escalations and a lot of melodrama. Onsite members were also deep in soup. Client was unhappy with the results. There was no reason for the team to continue with much enthusiasm. All of a sudden they started getting fever. Almost all of them. If they stretched for two three nights, i. e. they worked very hard for some days, they had fever on rest of the days of the week. The team got disconcerted, perturbed and  uncomfortable because of such fever attacks, therefore they came up with a novel idea.

The idea was to have a sheet in advance, a type of calendar to which only team members were privy to. It had all the details about the fevers. It had variety of fevers explained with symptoms in it. It had the Information about each and every team member’s fevers. It clearly described the candidates who where  vulnerable(feverish) on a particular day of week. In advance, it had also the description about the type of the fever the candidates were going to have on a given day of week. It allowed them some freedom. None of the fevers lasted more than two days or at max more than three days in succession. If you were lucky enough to get your fever, as per the fever calendar, on a Wednesday or on a Thursday, it meant that you were able to enjoy a long weekend. You then would have been able to go to your relatives, to attend marriage ceremonies or you might have enjoyed an excursion to a hill station. This chart was a boon for the health of the team members, for the manager, for onsite team members as well as for the client. In general it was a miracle for the project!

Once this calendar became a handy tool in the constitution of the offshore team, there were no escalations anymore. Things miraculously started to fall in the place for team members. Some of the team members were trying very hard to get released from the project. They were hapless. Their project manager, though a gregarious gentleman, being in the soup, was not able to bear separation from any of them. Once this calendar, this panacea, this magic potion, was brought into the system, it seemed as if a fairy started to grant everyone’s wishes. Some of the team members were immediately released from the project. They were very happy. They had the chance to see the faces of their family members after having survived a long phase of  brutal tyrannical torture and gestation. They even threw bashes happily for getting released from it all. Client became unexpectedly polite. The environment in the office became calm and soothing.

Trees were with lush green, beautiful leaves again. Drizzles in the Neptunian twilights fostered intellectual conversations. Some of them started to prepare for interviews. Sun shone brightly and rainbows seen from the windows of the office were very beautiful. Team members who left the project were happier but who stayed were no less robust afterwards. There remained no strain, no hyper-activity, no  escalations. There was harmony between onsite and offshore team members. It all happened because of that miraculous calendar named: “WHO IS GOING TO HAVE FEVER ON WHICH DAY? ”.

This calendar had to follow a few protocols:

1.       Fever never lasted more than three days in succession, though, after once getting a fever, you may have got it again, in the same week, if the fever you had last time was not for more than one day.
2.       You would have had the luxury of two different types of fevers in a single week but not more than that.
3.       You would have named your fever as viral, seasonal, malarial or anything you could have come up with, provided you did not exceed the inherent limits on the severity.
4.       If you would not have been able to come up with a special name for the type of fever you had, you would have  simply said “I am not feeling well” and it would have done the job.
5.       Not more than three people would have enjoyed the luxuries this fever allows on the same days of week.
6.       Seniors had the luxury of superior fevers in quality and quantity and vice versa.
7.       One who had most severe fever during the fortnight, was required to  arrange for a good party, at the end of the fortnight.